Just when I think we are done with mondegreens, someone hears the wrong song lyrics in a new song, or someone writes another book about mondegreens that I have to buy. The first list of mondegreens here is from the book I’ve mentioned several times, Mondegreens: A Book of Mishearings, by J. A. Wines. The second set is from a website called Mingle-Ish.
Artist or Group | Original Words | Misheard Words |
Simon and Garfunkel | Like a bridge over troubled water | Like a bridge over trouble, Walter |
Simon and Garfunkel | Parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme | Partially saved was Mary and Tom
Did Parsley save Rosemary in time? |
Elton John | Rocket man, burning out his fuse up here alone | Rocket man, burning up the trees on every lawn
Rocket man, running out of fuel and heading home |
REM | We are agents of the free | We are ancient Sophocles |
David Bowie | Ground Control to Major Tom | Clown Control to Mao Tse-Tung |
The Beatles | Strawberry fields forever | Strawberry fields for Trevor |
The Beatles | The magical mystery tour is coming to take you away | The magical mystery toad is coming to take you away |
Freddie Fender | Wasted days and wasted nights | Wave to Dave, and wave to Mike |
Glen Campbell | He’s a rhinestone cowboy | He’s a vile stoned cowboy |
From musical, Evita | Don’t cry for me Argentina | Don’t cry for me, I’m the cleaner |
Shakira | There’s the man I chose. There’s my territory | There’s the man I chose. There’s my Teletubby. |
Diana Ross and the Supremes | Stop, in the name of love | Stop, in the neighborhood. |
Duran Duran | Straddle the line / in discord and rhyme | Stand on the line / in disco and rhyme |
Ben Folds | Textbook hippie man | Texas handyman |
Harry Belafonte | Come Mr. Tally Man | Come Mr. Taliban |
Savage Garden | I want your face, yeah, all around me | I want your face hair all around me |
Artist or Group | Original Words | Misheard Words |
The Pretenders | Gonna use my sidestep | Gonna use my sausage |
Tina Turner | You’re simply the best, better than all the rest | You’re simply the best, better than an hour’s rest |
Justin Bieber | ‘Cause I just need one more shot at forgiveness | ‘Cause I just need one more shot, half a Guinness |
Aretha Franklin | ‘Cause you make me feel like a natural woman | ‘Cause you make me feel like a rash on a woman |
Alanis Morissette | It’s not fair / to deny me / of the cross I bear that you gave to me | It’s not fair / to deny me / of the cross-eyed bear that you gave to me |
Abba | You can dance / you can jive | You can dance / you can die |
Olivia Newton-John | Hopelessly devoted to you | I hope the city voted for you |
UB40 | Red red wine, stay close to me | Red red wine, steak lobster meat |
The Bangles | It doesn’t matter that I have to feed the both of us employment’s down | It doesn’t matter that I have to feed the buffalo some parmesan |
Kara Church
Pronouns: she/her/hers
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