Posted by: Jack Henry | December 15, 2020

Editor’s Corner: Contest Results, Second Edition

Hello! Today is part two of the malaphor contest results. Shawn, Mary, Brandi, and Keith, I thank you all and appreciate your submissions. Keith, you are one of our lucky winners, and your copy of He Smokes Like a Fish and Other Malaphors should already be on its way to you.

And before you get started, another warning: there are some PG-13 items in here.

Shawn Shepard

  • There’s no use crying over water under the bridge.
  • It’s time to fish or get off the pot.
  • A stitch in time gathers no moss.
  • One man’s trash is in the eye of the beholder.
  • Fortune favors more than you can shake a stick at.
  • Don’t make a mountain out of a hill of beans.
  • Up the creek with a fish out of water.
  • If you can’t stand the storm in the teacup, get out of the kitchen.
  • Let bygones go jump in the lake.
  • There’s more than one way to nip it in the bud.
  • Straighten up and go with the flow.

Brandi Binion

  • All that glitters is having cake and eating it too.
  • You can lead a horse to water, but every dog has its day.
  • An apple a day keeps the horse from drinking water.
  • Monkey see, monkey heard it through the grapevine.
  • Absence leads two to tango.
  • Absence costs an arm and a leg.
  • Absence makes the heart measure twice but cut once.
  • Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; give a man a rod and he will get the milk for free.

Mary Fleenor

  • Let sleeping dogs lie like a dog.
  • Flat as a fiddle.
  • He’s a pig in a blanket.
  • Money makes the world go rogue.
  • Slow as molasses.
  • Better half of one and six dozen of another.
  • Jumping the shark tank.
  • Spiking a cabin fever.
  • She pulled the blanket of snow over her head.
  • Pull the wool over your eyes on the prize.
  • Flogging a gift horse in the mouth.
  • Swept under the rug rats.
  • Squeaky wheels of justice get the grease.
  • Profits fell through the roof last year.
  • He’s got cold feet to the fire.
  • Three sheets to the wind tunnel.
  • Sea of lovesick.
  • Steaming hot cup of Joe Boxer.
  • A rose by any other name would stink after three days.
  • You are what you eat like a pig.

Keith Slayton

  • There is no sense crying when the tough get going.
  • Biting off more than a dead horse.
  • Don’t judge a book by the skin of your teeth.
  • He made his bed before they hatched.
  • Caught between a rock and a cold shoulder.
  • Kill two birds with a nail on the head.
  • Letting the cat out of the horse’s mouth.
  • That costs more than you can chew.
  • Fit as a blue moon.
  • You can’t make an omelet without breaking a second wind.
  • You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t steal his thunder.
  • Cool as a couch potato.
  • Comparing apples to cold turkey.
  • Don’t count your chickens when pigs fly.
  • Every cloud has spilt milk.
  • Elvis has left the two stools.
  • Possession is nine tenths; and that is a friend indeed.
  • The early bird is worth two in the bush.
  • Wound up like a woman scorned!
  • No pain, when you’re having fun.
  • Your guess is the benefit of the doubt.
  • Wrap your head around the drawing board.

Thank you again for your participation!

Ace Slayton “enjoying” his dad’s copy of the prize book.

Kara Church

Pronouns: she/her/hers

Technical Editor, Advisory

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