Editor's Corner

Good morning, folks!

It’s almost Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday of the year. Sure, there have been some challenging ones in the past: a Seattle power outage, which resulted in going to the International District for Chinese food. A misinterpreted recipe for amazing turkey, which resulted in a salt lick that only one of the guests could handle. A turkey thawed in a toxic paint bucket and the search on Thanksgiving Eve for a replacement. But guess what? Nobody died and each of those times were spent with friends and family. And there was pie.

I have an article for you today from Richard Lederer, our San Diego verbivore. The full article is here: Let’s talk turkey about our Thanksgiving holiday. Before you get started, let me say there are a bunch of “dad jokes” at the end of the article. You have been warned.

Have a happy holiday, everyone!

Thanksgiving Day is mainly a celebration of the harvest, giving thanks for bountiful crops. Traditionally, a particular meal in 1621 is thought to be the first Thanksgiving. Plymouth colonists and Wampanoag Indians sat down together to an autumn feast of venison and wild fowl.

On November 26, 1789, George Washington established the first national celebration of Thanksgiving. In 1863, Abraham Lincoln, hoping to unite a sundered nation, issued a proclamation declaring Thanksgiving to be a national holiday. Congress passed a joint resolution in 1941 decreeing that Thanksgiving should fall on the fourth Thursday of each November, where it remains today. Harry S. Truman established the tradition of granting a presidential pardon to a Thanksgiving turkey, who is then retired, alive and gobbling, to a petting farm.

Food and family are the cornerstones of the holiday. Thanksgiving traditions include preparing sumptuous meals that often include turkey, stuffing, gravy, sweet potatoes, cranberry sauce, and pumpkin pie.

The Pilgrims found in America a wild fowl somewhat similar in appearance to a fowl they had known back in England—a bird that had acquired the name turkey because it was first imported by way of Turkey, a Middle Eastern nation that doesn’t celebrate Thanksgiving…

So now’s the time to talk turkey.

Why do turkeys hate Thanksgiving?
Because they’re cut to pieces, they have the stuffing knocked out of them, and they’re picked on for days after Thanksgiving.

What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Eve?
“Quack! Quack!”

Why did the musicians let the turkey join the band?
Because she had the drumsticks.

Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.

Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected it of fowl play.

Why should you keep your eye off the turkey dressing?
Because it makes it blush.

What’s the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?
The turkey trot.

What three keys have legs but can’t open doors?
A turkey, a monkey, and a donkey.

What is the best thing to put into a turkey?
Your teeth.

What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
Enough drumsticks for a large Thanksgiving dinner.

Why is a Thanksgiving turkey a fashionable bird?
Because it always appears well dressed for dinner.

How do you make a turkey float?
You need two scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey.

What sort of glass would you serve cream of turkey soup in?
A goblet.

What disasters could happen if you dropped the Thanksgiving turkey?
The downfall of Turkey, the breakup of China, and the overthrow of Greece.

Kara Church | Technical Editor, Advisory | Knowledge Enablement

Pronouns: she/her | Call via Teams | jackhenry.com

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